grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
