you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Randomize
