I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
