Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize
