hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Edward fifth and chaser hands
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize