woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
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