absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
