We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
