Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Randomize
