i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
