a queef is a wish your heart makes.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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