Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Ambien. No doubt about it.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
