If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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