good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Randomize
