Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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