she was so not down for the gang bang
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
