yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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