I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
kristin has been a bad kristin
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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