If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
