I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
