Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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