i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize