what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
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