The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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