I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
