I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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