Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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