I skipped work to stalk him.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
