lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
