This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Randomize
