I would go down on you faster than GM stock
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
You were trust falling into bushes
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize
