And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
