he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
i now understand why vodka
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
