I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize
