Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
