So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
