When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
