You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
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