bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
