and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
