You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Randomize
