hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
