How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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