Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize
