return my video game
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Randomize
