I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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