i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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