i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
