She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
