so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
